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’ ‘I’m not sure it will matter. It might’ She sits up, bending her legs at the knees and leaning forward onto them, still holding the lock of hair in her fingers. She looks up at the moon, concentrating on the brightness of its glow. ‘What if he comes back?’ Looking back at the earth. A shrug. Nonchalance that she doesn’t feel. Then a long sigh. ‘I already chose. I’m here. I’m happy.’ A pause. ‘I am, I’m happy.’ ‘If you’re happy, why are you out here? Why are you running?’ Another tear begins its journey down her cheek as she resumes playing with her hair. ‘Because it still hurts. To know that I was wrong. To feel like maybe I wasted…. something. To wonder if I’m wrong now. To feel like I’m permanently trapped between choices.’ She glares. ‘You didn’t tell me it would be this complicated. You didn’t tell me it would hurt this much.’ Eventually, in the long silence, her glare subsides. Sadness flows back into her eyes and she returns to the simplicity of her hair. She. I obliged, when we got there, she asked if I would like to come in for a drink, they had snuck in some wine. I sat on the only chair and Diane sat on the bed, we sipped our wine, and she told me how Kris had been doing this for some time, going on cruises and having her little 'adventures' because she was so bored with her life at home. I couldn't really resent it, because Kris was a lot like me.. I asked Diane how come she went along, she told me that since her husband had passed away, she had not a lot to do, and since Kris paid for the trips, it was the only way she could afford to travel. I asked her, what about men friends, did she have anyone special, she replied that no, most of the old coots in her town were either married or past it or both. "What about on these cruises", I asked her, why don't you meet somebody like your daughter does ?" "Oh gosh, who would be interested in an old girl like me ?" I got up and sat next to her on the bed, put my arm around her waist, "I.
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